Today was the type of day that made me want to throw away the hard work I've put in for the last 5 months to lose 66 lbs and get on this journey of best self. For me, it's a small struggle each day to make healthy and positive choices (some days are easier than others). I know this will always be a part of me, but I've come to a point now where I can truly admit that I feel better physically and mentally when I eat well and exercise. This wins by a landslide against any temporary fix I "think" I feel from diving into a cupcake or super size fries.
The problem I find is that although I have changed in every possible way for the better and am happier for it, the triggers that got me to 257 lbs still exist around me and have not changed. Although my ability to handle them in a more positive and fruitful manner is making me a better wife, mother, friend, etc., it's an uphill battle that gets the best of me sometimes.
Physically, I am the strongest and in the best shape I have ever been. Mentally, I am still processing this new person I'm growing into. She is everything I've always wanted to be, but sometimes her shoes seem too big to fill.
Every day is a small struggle, but I can happily say that my ability to reason with myself to make the best choices instead of giving in too easily, has become strong. It's a harder decision to make, but in the end, I know these are small steps in getting to where I want to be. I am choosing ME for the first time in my life. I am worth it.
Just know that YOU are worth it.
xo