I can hardly believe it, but not too long ago, I reached the halfway point of my mission.
I had originally envisioned reaching this significant milestone sometime around my birthday in October, but I hit it more than two months ahead of schedule. (As a lifelong overachiever, I'm pretty stoked about that.) I had long planned to commemorate hitting the halfway point with something equally meaningful and that, like getting healthy, I have also always wanted to do: get a single piercing in a non-lobe part of my ear. Very early into my weight loss, I decided that for my birthday this year, I would give myself halfway-to-goal weight as a present, and finally put that coveted extra hole in my head.
Well, my body had other ideas. It decided to scorch that timetable and reassign some of the meaning of the piercing. (NO PROBLEM THERE!)
In July, when I knew halftime was imminent, my BFF from high school and I had a conversation in which we organically decided to go together so that she could get the two new tattoos she wanted and I could get the new piercing I wanted. By coincidence, her two tattoos are each behind one of her ears, so there's a bit of a friendship-bracelet aspect to my piercing now, too. Between our competing and overbooked traveling schedules this summer, the soonest we could get in for our planned body defacements was this past Friday. And we got 'er done.
This piercing represents a binding contract: No turning back.
This jewelry represents a binding contract: Live with strength.
When I was choosing the stud for the piercing, I was torn between this one and a white-gold star. The star had obvious symbolism (I'm a star! *eye roll*) and was less expensive. I was drawn to this triangular cluster of three circles immediately, though. I ultimately chose it over the star because I think it best represents the person I want to be and believe I am becoming: feminine and strong. There's nothing dainty about this earring, but it's classic, elegant, and distinctly feminine. In terms of the shape, circles have no beginning or end, they just keep going -- I've got to just keep going. My favorite thing, though, is the triangle that those circles form. I recently heard an interview with an architect on a podcast I listen to, where the architect said that the triangle is the strongest shape because each side can bear an equal load, and even when one side bears more, its other two legs are capable of supporting it so it won't collapse. I found that interesting at the time -- interesting enough to remember it many weeks later -- but I didn't attach any additional meaning to that sound byte until it came back to me as I was selecting my jewelry. I smile every time I catch a glimmer of my new earring in the mirror and I think of that.
So, I have pierced the moment at halftime. I'm never going back to that pathetic train wreck I was before. In femininity and strength, I have been reborn.
The best part about being halfway there is, I know I've got this now. When I first started, I had no idea if I would be able to see it through to the end this time. There was a great deal of ground to be covered, and I had to completely change everything about the way I was living to make it possible to cover any of it. It was a daunting task, and one I've run from before. For whatever wonderful reason, though, I got down this time. I got strong. I got disciplined. I got tough. I got fearless.
I know I can lose this last half of the weight because, well, I've already done it once. "I can't" is the least valid it's ever been. I can't NOTHING.
That's pretty damn exciting.