I understand the whole "eating healthy" thing (for the most part). I definitely didn't care when I was pregnant, even though I swore up and down that I was going to eat super healthy and work out all the time. Well...maybe if we had gotten pregnant naturally, but we didn't. We went through IVF with all of the awesome hormone injections that definitely didn't help the weight loss. I won't say that they made me gain weight, because I don't necessarily think they did. The IVF clinic telling me not to work out definitely contributed to the weight gain before the embryo transfer though. And by the time I was "cleared" to exercise, I didn't want to anymore. I liked being lazy. I liked eating like crap. Which was pretty much a 180 from where I was before I was told to stop working out. I loved eating healthy. I loved going to the gym and sweating my ass off. So I'm hoping that, once I get used to it again, I will love it again...? 

At this point, we have cleared the house of any unhealthy foods I might want to eat. We still have some things in the house that aren't necessarily 100% healthy because, on top of our 3 month old baby, we have a 9.5 year old daughter. She gets to eat whatever she wants though because she swims for an hour a day, five days a week for swim team practice. Today, I got really hungry and I know that technically this diet bet doesn't start until tomorrow, but I wanted to kickstart it since I weighed in yesterday. Anyways, I wanted NOTHING to do with anything healthy in the house. In the past, I would just chug a bunch of water and that would take care of things. I tried that today, and it didn't work. It took everything in me not to dig into the coconut ice cream we had in the freezer. I just kept myself busy with laundry and housework. That seemed to work...until I had two servings of pasta for dinner. 

On top of the eating issue, I don't know when I will ever find time to go to the gym. My gym doesn't watch babies until they turn 6 months old. My husband works two jobs, and I go to school (not right now...I'm on break and bored out of my mind). If I suggest to my husband that I want to go to the gym, he seems a little iffy about it. And maybe he should...I have a bunch of injuries from being deployed to Afghanistan and getting blown up: 1) torn ligaments and potential bone scar tissue and bone spurs in my left hip that cause my hip to partially dislocate after moving it a certain number of degrees 2) my right wrist is totally fused to take care of the posttraumatic arthritis that I had, after I had a major tendon removed because it was shredded 3) my back is injured...they don't necessarily know how because the VA hasn't really looked into it, but they know that there is something wrong with it 4) a brain injury that gives me migraines minimally three times a week and 5) associated psychological issues. Obviously, only the first three really apply to working out. I can't do pushups because my wrist doesn't bend. I can't run (well...I can....if I want to pop my hip joint and be in massive pain for the next couple of days) because of my hip. Before we found out I was going to have hip surgery some time in the near future, my husband just told me to be careful at the gym. Now he doesn't want me to go at all because he doesn't want me to hurt myself more. And if I'm not going to the gym...what am I supposed to do? Walk? I downloaded the Couch 2 5k app and he almost lost his mind. These aren't necessarily injuries that I can "push past the pain" with. So my motivation for exercising isn't exactly there, you know? I want to lose weight, I want to get in shape, I want to be a good example to my daughters about eating healthy and being active...but how am I supposed to do that right now if I can't even figure out what kind of exercises I can do? Walking gets boring after a while. 

I guess I'm just looking for my motivation. I'm looking for something that I can do (besides Pokemon Go, which is, at the very least, getting me out of the house twice a day, for a minimum walk of 2 miles each time) that gets me excited to work out. Does anyone have any ideas?