I got into a bit of a disagreement with my sister over the weekend. My mom has decided to start a challenge among her friends and family members to lose weight by June. This comes from my mom already losing over 13 lbs and wanting to keep her success going. That's great right?! Well it is for most of the people invited to do the challenge, but not for me.

You see, growing up was not always easy for me. My mother and I are very different, and those differences left a lot of room for words to be hurtful, and good intentions to sting. One of the biggest differences we had between each other is discussing our weights or weight-loss. My mother wanted me to lose weight of course, but the way she went about encouraging me was not the way I needed to be encouraged, in fact it was quite the opposite and it brought me down severely. Now I don't blame her at all, and I know she means well, but I am so different from my siblings and it is hard for her to recognize that sometimes. What she can say to my sister to get her motivated is not what she can say to me. (My sister is a little firecracker and is out to prove the world wrong)

Even if I don't blame her, it is still hard to detach myself from what is being said, and I end up getting depressed over it usually. So when the whole idea of this challenge came up, and things were said over the phone (with intent to encourage me, I think?) I automatically recoiled. Not only do I not want to be involved in something like weight loss with my mom, but I don't want a bunch of family members and friends knowing my weight, nor do I want to race in such a short amount of time to see who can lose the most weight. I want to lose weight because I want to do it for myself. So my sister and I chatted about me not accepting the challenge, and we disagreed big time, but that's okay. As I told her, I'm difficult to understand, and what works for others won't always work for me and I left it at that. However, the more I think about it, the more I am confident in my stance on the matter: "Weight-loss should be totally personal".

Now I'm not saying that you can't have a workout buddy, or that you shouldn't share your weight with anyone at all, but what I'm saying is that the REASONS we lose weight should be personal. Our goals that we set should be set for ourselves, what we want to look like or weigh, not based on society or numbers thrown out there by family. Our end date goals should be set at a pace that we feel comfortable with. Most importantly, we should desire to lose weight for healthy reasons instead of impossible ones. Below I've listed a few types of each kind of reason, good and bad to expand on what I'm talking about.

GOOD REASONS TO LOSE WEIGHT

Overall Health

Most everyone in the weight-loss journey knows that the best reason for shedding off those extra pounds is to increase your overall health. Obesity is one of the world's leading health risks and can lead to diseases of the heart, bones, blood, etc. So taking off some weight, completing disregarding physical appearance, focusing only on long-term benefits, is the best reason you can decide to start

Overall Fitness

I don't know about you, but when I go to the grocery store and toss a 24 pack of water into my cart like it's bread, I feel absolutely amazing. Especially when the older gentleman in the aisle stares at me with a hint of terror in his eyes.... When you feel strong, you most likely feel happier. You are able to get out and enjoy life because your body is up to whatever challenge you put on it. A great reason to get in shape is to never have to say no to doing something you want to do.

Overall Confidence

Here's the big one! We know when we don't like what we see in the mirror, and even though I am a firm believer in accepting yourself however you are, I also believe in changing yourself for the better if you see the need. No matter what you look like, your heart will stay the same, but if it's easier to be that person without a few extra pounds, then go ahead and make those changes. I suffer from an anxiety disorder, and a big part of my anxieties come from judgement from other people, especially about my appearance. I don't want to be the center of attention, because I'm not happy with the way I look. This fact keeps from doing a lot of things I want to do. So if losing the weight means you are able to be confident and take that dance class, or go to that boat party, or do something that would normally terrify you, then what's a better reason to shed some fat? If only to be happier and more confident?

Other smaller, but equally cool reasons

  • Clear Skin
  • More Energy
  • Happiness
  • Easier to Breathe
  • Better Sleep
  • New Friends
  • Your Story will Inspire
  • You'll be a Better Cook in the End

And now we get on some reasons that you should probably not be focusing on solely to lose weight.

  1. Because Hollywood does it.
  2. To win someone back.
  3. Because the diet pill may work and it's easy.
  4. Because that event you have is in a week.
  5. Because someone other than your doctor told you too.
  6. Because you want to be accepted
  7. Because men/women think it's more atracted
  8. Because you think people think you're lazy
  9. Because you want thigh gaps
  10. Because you want to be like the rest of the world, and everyone in it.

Let me just tell you one thing, and if it's the only thing you take away from this post so be it.....No matter how much you weigh, how clear your skin is, how well your clothes fit, how long you spend on your makeup, how much you spend on your hair......they will always find a reason to judge you. The world will ALWAYS judge you, so please don't do it for them. Do it for you, because in the end, if everyone walks out on you, from your mother to your goldfish, you will be left with you, yourself, and your body. Make it personal, shut the world out, and take over your own world. You'll be glad you did...

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