Disappointed but not discouraged

Posted on November 23, 2014

Since I was feeling like the people in my lives weren't really a part of my weightloss journey I decided to ask a few of them to join one of the bets with me. I know that some bets are costly specially if you aren't really that commited. But I was asking them to join a bet I just started that is a lower dollar amount. Plus since this bet started the leader of this bet has been so awesome and on top of posting as well as encouraging others. I thought this would be a great starter bet for a few friends and family. Also I thought it would be a great way to get motivation and support that I was feeling like I was missing.

17 invites and 16 no's(1 maybe) later here I sit disappointed.

I do not send out invites lightly. I know how it feels to think someone is calling you fat by inviting you to eat less, work out more, and whatever backhanded way it could come acrossed. So I thoughtfully sent out requests to people who had said how they wished they could lose weight like I had been doing, wanted a change, or who were actively working on becoming healthy.

It is amazing how people say they want/need to change things then give you the excuse of maybe after the holiday's, I don't want to lose money, or my personal favorite my hormones are messed up and I can't lose weight.

Yes, this was a legit response.

It took alot of effort for me not to say to that one, well my hormones have been wako since puberty and have just recently decided to work properly because I have been eating properly and exercising daily.(I kept that one to myself)

One of the most disappointing no's was actually from my mom. For months she has talked about aches, pains, and gaining weight(she, like I, loves food). I thought we could totally do this together she did a 5k with me at the beginning of the year surely this bet that is only $10 dollors and activity she can do would work. This was when the 'I am so busy maybe after the Holiday's' response was given to me. So now that makes 2 close family members negatives on the support front.

I am very disappointed by all of the no's but I am not going to let it get me down. Over the years I have had to learn to just do my own thing because I was different from my family. So I am going to continue to do just that. Honestly it is just me in the end anyways, right.

I am keeping it moving and being greatful for this wonderful dietbet community.

Thanks for the support!!

Comment Now!

Brit

11/25/2014 4:14AM

Don't feel so bad. People have to have the drive and desire to change themselves. You can't make them want to change. Wanting it and doing it are two different things. So many people want to lose the weight, but doing it is a different story. All you can do is provide a little nudge and hope they will take the bait, but if not, don't take it personally. I think you did a great job trying to help them find motivation.

Soup likes this comment.

prsmomdoc

11/24/2014 3:15PM

Great job on your success. I think that you shouldn't think of the rejections as not supporting you on your journey. People have their own reasons not to do things, that likely have nothing to do with you personally. Since joining DB 4 months ago (alone), more and more interest has been brewing from my friends and family. 2 friends and my sister have joined, and more have been telling me that they are interested in joining. I think that the more success you have and that they see you are happier, some may come around. Like others have said, weight loss is such a personal thing, the motivation and desire has to come within. Some, although they complain, may not be ready. Be supportive of them when they are. Good luck to you!

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Soup

11/24/2014 1:12PM

I am very grateful that I have this resource. Before I moved here I had a friend who was always there to do 5k's, go on walks/hikes, and was there to talk about diets. Since moving it has been hard not having the same strong support of someone who had gone through and was still going through the same changes. I am starting to get back on track to where I was before and it is do to the encouragement and support that everyone here has been giving me. Sure I now have to do my 5k's alone but I get to share them with you all here. I just have to remember to keep pushing because I am only hurting myself if I stop.

Thank you ladies!!

Els momma

11/24/2014 8:24AM

I invited one friend that complains about weight loss 24/7 and she came by last night making excusses. I have no support system and home that's why I'm so glad I found this community.

Soup and Els momma like this comment.

Rebekah Y.

11/24/2014 5:16AM

Try not to let it get you down Soup. Everyone has to come to the decision on their own. I've come across the same problem. People have to be ready to put in the work to lose the weight. A lot of times they are intimidated by the amount of work it takes so they don't want to bother in the first place. It can be a total motivation killer if you let it rub off on you. When they finally get to that point where they are ready to do something about it, then they will come ask you for advice. In the meantime, humor them when they talk about wanting to lose weight, but don't try to talk them into it. We're all here for you Soup and we're ready to commit! :-)

Soup, Els momma and Susie S. like this comment.

Sharayah S.

11/24/2014 12:38AM

I'm sorry you feel unsupported. Imagine their regret when they see all the weight you have lost, while they maintain the status quo! :)

Soup, Lexi, Kelsey D., Els momma and Susie S. like this comment.