So a little background... my weigh has been up and down for as long as I can remember. At my highest weight in high school I was about 160 (at 5'4"). During my first year of college I slowly lost about fifteen pounds, and my weight wavered around 145.
I was still not satisfied with that weight. I would go to the gym with my roommate, who was one inch taller than me and weighed 125. My goal was to weigh less than she did (I know, messed up)...
So the summer after I moved out of the dorms and into a house with some acquaintances, I decided I was going to reach my goal once and for all. I was not patient, and did not approach it healthily. In about 2 months I lost 25 pounds (which is a lot for someone who is not really that overweight). I remember I had a system: if I ate 600 calories or fewer it was a successful day, if I ate over 800 calories I had failed. I remember weighing myself every day and losing almost a pound... every day...
Oh and on top of that I was exercising a ton... needless to say that was NOT healthy. I stopped getting periods (for a while), was always hungry and cranky.
Since that summer my weight has slowly climbed up to around 145-150 although I am not particularly happy about that, I have accepted that what I did is not something I could ever do again.
As for comparing myself to my friend, I still work out with her, and I am still shorter and weigh more than her. Yet I can deadlift 175 pounds and she can't... my point is that comparing myself to her was entirely silly because we had such different body compositions.
I am naturally a muscular person. I currently weigh 144 pounds and people guess my weight to be 130. I am a competitive ballroom dancer and esthetics are extremely important. In the real world I am quite fit, but for a competitive ballroom dancer I look about 25 pounds too heavy (I think).
Regardless, I am trying to let go of obsessing over declining number on the scale, and appreciate how eating well and exercising makes me feel and changes my body.
I am sure that a lot of us can relate to obsessing over numbers on the scale. Even if I lose this dietbet, I am glad that I am losing weight at a slow, steady pace that I know I can sustain. My current goal is to have a lean, muscular body, which I know will take time to reach. Afterall, had I gone the route I went two years ago, I would have been disqualified for losing too much too quickly.
Peace :)
Posted on July 23, 2014
Comment Now!
Sign in to CommentI liked this a lot. It's so important not to pick a particular person, especially, to constantly compare oneself to. I've done it many times. I'm also a dancer (social, not competitive), and after spraining my ankle I started physical therapy. Now that I'm finally learning to balance and walk so I can distribute my strength throughout my body rather than risking injury by stressing one part or another, I'm respecting my body more, too. I too am naturally muscular, and I will never have narrow shoulders or small bones. If I can feel energetic and brave in my physical life again, especially while dancing, that will be a great thing. Good for you for taking your mind off the numbers and your friend's weight. It sounds like you're making amazing progress in body and in mind.
Congratulations on taking a healthier approach this time. This year I've become a firm believer in losing weight slowly. Good luck in your diet bet!
Ready To Try Something New?
Have Fun. Lose Weight. Win Money.