Seriously, why are you such a douche bag??

Posted on December 11, 2014

I knew when moving here that things would be different and at times very trying. Starting over, again, and having to figure out my place here was going to be hard. I knew this. For the first few months when it was just my sister and I we worked well together. Mind you I only had one person fighting eating well. Because of course the skinny person mentality in this house is 'eh just eat in moderate you will be fine'.

Memo to the skinny people: I have been fat since birth moderation is not my deal I have been moderating my shit for the past year and a half and I am still stuck in the high 200's. So please shove your moderation some place the sun does not shine.

So after the small battles with the skinny person who just magicly lost weight while still eating sweets and doing minimal activity I now have super douche to deal with.

Do not get me wrong on rare occasions he does nice things for others and my sister. But have you ever gone to a frat party/any party and there is that one dude that wants to out do everyone in evertyhing. You know the one that tries to out drink everyone, tries to out handstand everyone, tries to correct you when you clearly know what you are talking about, and the list of outdoing goes on.

Having just a sister I hoped that she would have married someone that I wanted to be around at least some of the time. Nope. We went Christmas shopping for my sister today and I honestly did it because it was for my sister. I am starting to get to my level of taking one for the team.

Now that Mr. I can do anything better than you is back it is now how much healthier he is than me. I do not know about you but living with people who tell you the things you are trying to do to better yourself is wrong tends to make you want to karate chop them in the throat. Yes, I have a lot of pent up angst. I figure anyone would feel this way specially when the know it all lifts his shirt and says look at these abs I think I am ok to eat some sweets. Yes, this 100% happened today.

Excuse me sir but we are full up on douche bags today. Thanks.

With the return of the all mighty know it all I now have taken to spending more time in my room. If I leave my cave I get infected by the doucheness and I do not need that in my life. So since my cave is the smallest in the house I do not get in as many work outs as before. Honestly feeling cut off and like what I am doing is wrong has helped me lose my motivation.

I really, really, miss my life in Iowa.(which suprises me since it is really cold there right now) I enjoyed my job, my new supportive friends, and many fun things that I was able to do/see. I need to find a local work out buddy. It would be so nice to have someone to do activities with that didn't make me feel left out or stupid for not keeping up. Oh that would be the dream.

Definitely having a rough time right now but I am still trying to keep it together. Daily reminding myself that people would love to live in Hawaii right now and that God doesn't give you more then you can handle. I just wish God would have better equiped me to deal with obnoxious know it alls.

Comment Now!

Michelle D.

12/07/2015 11:32AM

I can totally relate to "moderation is not my deal". It's not my deal either, neither are the people that spout off about it as if it were that simple. I just want to tell them oh wow, moderation . . . . why didn't I THINK of that?? Thanks for bringing that strategy to my attention. If you'd only told me about using moderation sooner, I could've avoided this whole morbid obesity thing altogether.I love your writing & your ability to express your frustration with such humor. Hang in there, I sincerely hope things get better soon!

Carol W.

12/12/2014 12:20AM

Hang in there. Is this your only living arrangement options?

Els momma

12/11/2014 9:03AM

Hang in there. Don't let negative people get you down. They like that. I hope everything can get better. I know you're trying to keep the peace but maybe you can say something to your sister about the problems.

Carol W. likes this comment.

Tessa

12/11/2014 7:54AM

I will be praying for you! Nobody should have to deal with all the negativity everyday, I really hope things change for the better for you. But for now, I agree with the other comments, taking a long walk away from everything should definitely raise your mood. I often go on runs and walks when I'm stressed, because if it's going to be a lousy day, I might as well get my workouts done so I feel like it wasn't a complete failure. And I like the idea of looking for a motivating work out buddy! You got this!

Carol W. likes this comment.

polkadot25

12/11/2014 5:25AM

Sorry that you don't have a supportive atmosphere at home. Hiding in your room sounds a bit depressing, my getaway is to go for a long walk in a park I particularly like while listening to music. I usually walk for 2 - 2.5 hours, you'd be amazed how many calories you burn just walking for that amount of time. No douchebag around, just me and nature. Hope you find a spot like for yourself.

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Brit

12/11/2014 3:58AM

This doesn't sound good at all. You can't find outdoor activities to do just to get out of the negative atmosphere? It is hard to lose weight and it is even harder to do it when you don't have the support you need. Don't lose your motivation though. Keep on doing what you've been doing.

Carol W. and Susie S. like this comment.