I have managed to surround a fair portion of my life with friends who are, well, considerably overweight. I think at my heaviest (about 80 lbs heavier than I am now), I was most comfortable with people whose weight was even more out of control than my own. I didn't consciously realize I was doing it. Now, looking back, it was clearly a coping mechanism. I guess I must have felt better if I wasn't the fattest person in the room. Man oh man, what a sad statement to admit.
I still love my friends but, I also find them frustrating. I bet they feel the same way about me. I want them to come on a bike ride with me, or a hike, or play some golf or...whatever. Needless to say, that is typically met with excuses...much like the ones I would have given to my friends who were more fit and thoughtful about their eating. I find myself being cautious about what I do, talk about with my friends who have not made any changes and continue to have serious struggles with their weight. In some ways, they seem annoyed with me and simply want their fat friend back. I work hard at being thoughtful to their sensitivities and often downplay what I'm doing, what size of jeans I am in or whatever.
This fat friend is done being fat. They will continue to be my friends, but I'm also developing new friends that share my journey of fitness and healthier eating. They will be interested in my new fitbit and how it works...they will be interested in recipes that are tasty and healthy at the same time and talking about it...they will want to join in on whatever it is. It's the blending of different lives and worlds.
One of my newest friends is a real joy. We talk food. We golf together. We are going to take paddleboarding lessons together...I am so glad she came into my life. I will now have friends of all sizes, shapes, and fitness :)