I've been meaning to write this post for a while but kept putting it off. Then today, as I was taking my clothes off the line, I looked at my jeans and just had a moment of disbelief. I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that they were MY jeans. How could those tiny jeans belong to ME?

Despite my success, I haven't posted many before and after pictures outside of my immediate circle because I don't see it. I can look in the mirror and think "wow, I'm skinny" but if I saw a picture of myself in the same outfit, my eyes add 100 lbs. So, I don't share them. I don't like hearing reactions of my loss, since in my head I think, "that's it?"

There has only been one set of photos that caused me to notice my weight loss, and it's funny because the comparison isn't of highest to lowest, but from halfway to lowest. 

The pictures I've shared are last year at this time, doing the kid's Spartan, to May of this year. And the only reason I see the difference is because of how I felt in those moments: shame vs pride. 

I've also shared a picture of my jean since that prompted me to post. On the right, you have size 22. On the left size 6. In my head I know that's a big difference and yet, I don't see it.

Clearly, I've got to give my head a shake and start some of that self-love stuff I hear about.