Posted on March 26, 2015

So, I feel like in writing this, I am being bold. I don't generally like to put myself out there or be the focal point of permanent written word on the World Wide Web, but I feel the need to convey my internal thoughts and put them out into the universe. I am currently afraid of two things: 1.) My upcoming 10-day vacation and 2.) Vocalizing about said vacation to strangers.

Over the past decade as I transitioned from teenager, to twenty-something, to almost-thirty, I have thrown down and battled with my weight. In all honesty, I am learning to love my body. With a thyroid that just won't work to its potential, my weight hit an uncomfortable 220 something (I won't be specific because numbers shouldn't define me, though internally they seem to) somewhere around 2012. I successfully lost (and kept off) forty of those pounds with Weight Watchers.

I loved the program and still respect it, but in 2015, I knew I needed to lose the rest of my weight on my own. Thus, I joined this Diet Bet because it allowed for accountability with independence. It gave me a fun incentive for losing weight and it got me mindful of healthy loss again. After nearly two months of mindful eating using Spark People (the occasional glass of wine here and there...a visit to a Guy Fieri restaurant...a few splurges), I have regained my attitude towards food and I have not let it become a controlling factor. I returned back to yoga and I am feeling enthusiastic and energetic again.

But, the threat of a vacation still lingers in the air. Isn't the threat of a joyous time a bit contradictory? I mean, I need the time to decompress, to get a break from some of my more "interesting" students (for a serious lack of better words), to breath in air other than that of New Jersey. I am so eager to visit the warmer atmosphere in Florida, hang at Cinderella's castle, and visit the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.

How do I ensure that I don't revert to my old ways? How do I make it so that food is not the central focus of this trip and not resent myself (or my boyfriend who can eat anything) for it? I know I will be exercising, that is not an issue, but I have never vacationed without overindulging. My vacations have always been defined by the most savory bites and excess. How do I deprive without feeling deprived?

So far, I have lost about ten pounds since starting this shift in my life and I certainly don't want to put the weight back on (certainly not on the booty that can already use shrinking!). People in "real life" don't seem to understand...I often get, "Eh, it's vacation. Live a little. Who cares if you put on a few pounds? It'll eventually come back off..." So, seriously, I am wondering, how do you ignore the other voices other than your own?

Just some food for thought on a rainy, pre-spring break Thursday.

First poster problems.

~J

Comment Now!

Jessie

03/27/2015 3:32PM

Thank you for the words of inspiration. Sometimes what we think is "holding us back" is really all in our heads. Enjoy your spring break!

HappyCake

03/26/2015 6:17PM

Hey! I am also about to go on Spring Break! I'm scared too because my little vacation is a stop to a bigger city, but it's chock full of great restaurants. I completely understand when you hear people telling you to relax and eat since you're on vacation and it kinda annoys me when I hear them tell me that.Well, the best thing to do is that you CAN relax by convincing yourself that you have (or will have) your eating habits under control. You won't have to worry about gaining weight when you tell yourself that you WON'T overeat. You can tell yourself "I will eat this much and I don't need anymore. Food will always be there!" So, savor what you can and relax because you know you've got it under control. You've already lost 10 lbs! You got this! :)

Shaun

03/26/2015 10:36AM

Great blog piece. It is very easy to indulge or just say you will work it off later. For me, I tell myself that if I don't eat it I wont have to work it off later, I need to work off what I already have. I'm going on vacation to Disneyland myself soon and yes, I will probably have a Dole whip... but I'll split it and not eat the whole thing. Which is my other strategy: splitting foods in 1/2 with someone. Also, I like to smuggle in a protein bar and eat it during the day to help fight off those cravings. It's so easy for me and others to just say these things but doing them is another story. For me, it all comes down to willpower and how bad you want it. That Butterbeer is delicious looking but is it worth the calories ? is it worth the 10 minutes of enjoyment it takes to drink it? cause that one drink is probably an hour on a treadmill and likely has little to no actual nutritional value. These are just the things I think about sometimes when being tempted by a delicious treat.

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Jessie

The splitting concept I can definitely get behind. Isn't it strange that what seems like common sense is what we need to be most commonly reminded of in our decisions? I love the Dole Whips! Hopefully they have them in Disney World! Thanks for the advice and kindness!

Lee D.

03/26/2015 10:27AM

I totally get your fear. We were actually on vacation during the first weigh-in and I was very anxious about it, but luckily it turned out okay. One of the most important things I did was bring the same food for breakfast that I'd normally eat. We were in a condo with a kitchen, so that helped, but if you think you'll be eating out, just try to pick things similar to what you'd usually have. Sounds easier said than done, I know. I was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of menus had "skinny" options for drinks, and still tasted pretty good for 1/3 of the calories. Another thing I found helpful to keep in mind was that I didn't need to have a beer just because everyone else was, or I didn't need to have as many. If you order a water w/ every drink, it'll take you longer to finish that drink, so you won't be taking in as many calories. One of my biggest hurdles is trying not to eat when I'm not actually hungry, but keeping that in mind on vacation really helped. Good luck and have fun!!

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Jessie

This was very helpful and insightful! I usually eat a pretty small breakfast, so I think I will get protein bars. The information about the drinking is very smart...one for one! I have to get over the eating just to eat concept as well. It is so much easier said than done!