For some reason when I can't sleep at night I will lie there and think about all the things I want to do the next day and have so much enthusiasm for it! I will make grand plans about working out and cleaning and reading and painting and getting into running and sewing and learning to play an instrument and practice speaking French. I really want it all so much!
Then the day comes and I do next to none of those things, even if I have the time. I have been getting my workouts in, but honestly I'm typing this right now becaue I'm avoiding doing my workout for today.
I have my usual moticational adages running through my head:
"You won't regret the workout if you do it, but you will very much regret NOT doing it."
"It will only take 30 minutes! Then you will be so proud of yourself and feel better!"
"Stick with the plan! Remember why you started this!"
"Future you will thank you for continuing this. Think of future you!"
"I'm tired of starting over, so I NEED to stop stopping at all this time! Just do it!"
I even tried to not even think about it. That often works. If I turn the brain off (not easy to do) and just go through the motions of putting on my workout clothes, lacing up those shoes, and pressing play I generally get through the workout. Only once in my life have I ever turned off a video half way through a workout and walked away from it. So, not thinking should have gotten it done. Yet, I am dressed and ready to go, but rather than pressing play I ended up lying on the couch like a lump. Hmm.
Where does my enthusiam during restless nights come from? Part of me thinks I should just take on a vampire lifestyle. If I want to do all this great stuff at night, maybe I should! But, realistically, I don't want to do that. It's impractical and would probably drive my boyfriend nuts. I realized something else last night when I was thinking all these grand thoughts: the one thing I really regret about my life so far is that I have not had much fun! I have wasted a lot of time feeling anxious and more years than I even want to admit were spent feeling pretty miserable. So, I do at the very least need to relax and enjoy myself more. I have to stop stressing! I am at an interesting changing point in my life where I can do whatever I want to do, not just what I have to to get by, yet... here I am sitting on the couch, and as much as I must love typing these rambling blogs to the dietbet world, this isn't exactly what I would call fun. I guess having freedom can be daunting too, in an odd way.
Do anyone else out there do this? Make grand plans during the sleepless nights, yet struggle with the follow through? I imagine it is actually quite common. I sure do wish I could tap into that enthusiam when the sun is up though.
Ok, it's time to stop procrastinating and do that workout. Even a half hearted workout is better than no workout, right? Besides, it might be fun and I might surprise myself and have a great time.