I'm about 2.5 lbs from the DB goal and 5 lbs from my personal goal. However, this posting is more about the small, emotional nudges we as humans deal with every second and their play on our mindfulness and habits.

I indulged at brunch on Sunday - eating past satisfaction. This also happened on Saturday as well. How can I tell? Well...the most obvious is that I get a slight pain above my belly button and I'm just plain full. Thankfully, the food on Saturday was at least healthy (but still too much) and the brunch on Saturday - we went for a 5.5 mile walk afterwards. 

But why do we go there...eating past satisfaction? 

Part for me is habit and that I still "see" food on my plate or lunch bag. This goes back to lessons we learned as children. I was taught to be in the 'Clean Plate Club'. I resigned for many years and then, with so many habits ingrained, I took up membership again without even knowing it. Some of the tricks to incorporate now: (1) Packing a smaller lunch with me to class, (2) Cutting up the food into portions when it gets to the table, and (3) still keeping track of the 'cue' that tells me I'm at satisfaction. As my German relatives say "Ich bin satt."...when they are done eating ..."I'm satisfied.".

Another issue is that I have had horrible PMS since my teens. Also, going through a life transition and giving up so much to make it to the next step...Well, it all can wear me down sometimes. And mixing the two together can be a pain in the heart, head and butt. With this DB, I learned that my walks are needed to get some cardio, free up calories but most importantly....clear my head and heart. Yesterday, I was so down, I didn't workout but still ate well. Today, I got out there...late...but I got out and did my walk. I also stuck to my guns and submitted my weekly weigh-in...after gaining .5 lbs from the overeating this past weekend.

This was part of my 'Wish List' - to be consistent with the actions. No one said every day, or even every week or month would be perfect. But I can still allow myself to be emotional while walking, plugging in to MFP, drinking my water and even blogging. Whatever you're feeling, just take it with you. If I only did healthly things when I was happy...I'd be in big trouble! 

And please understand...I would love to veg out right now with a burger, onion rings, feet up - watch TV and drinking milkshakes - allowing myself to be comforted by the indulgences. But like a recovering alcoholic - this image of 'comforting' is a mirage developed from examples we grew up with or developed over time. It's been labeled as 'comforting' because of the tastes, feelings and actions we asscoiate with 'relaxing'. But that's the habit I'm learning to break. 

So, my new visual of 'comfort'? Walking, doing yoga and meditation while listening to soft music, hot shower, massage - a lot more options than the above. Between calls today - a mini-yoga session with music and a hot shower will be part of what will help me get through another rough patch. Just like with everything else - this to shall pass.