What a powerful post, Sha. It's difficult, having such a complicated relationship with food - feelings of shame/guilt. I FEEL YOU! Julie is right - we are all human and we all fail. The key for me has been getting that 'place' in myself where I'm fed up (no pun intended!) with feeling 'bad'. I know that fries are delicious - and always will be. But the way I feel afterwards isn't usually worth the 5 min of excitement I get from eating them. We know that it is hard to make good decisions. Particularly when you're feeling emotionally drained. Maybe take today to plan out your tomorrow - try and get 30 min of exercise (something fun! a walk somewhere pretty?) and some health(ier) meals than what you've been doing? Little successes end up leading to bigger ones! Planning has been KEY for me. And I know that even if I work out, I'll still gain weight if I don't watch what goes in my mouth (unfortunately!). Just take it one day (or meal!) at a time. Plus - FW's are the best support team! ;)