October 19, 2014
My weight has been slowly creeping up since 2011. It has sort of yo yo'd between 120-128 lb, but this year was different. I had for the first time since highschool reached a weight of over 130. My weight as of right now is 139!!!! Im in schock of how much I have let my self go.... I was 115lb when I first met my husband which was almost 5years ago. I think thats when my weight started to spiral out of control. Now I'm trying to find a balance between life, work, healthy eating and fitness. It's hard to start a routine and stick with it. My goal is not only to weigh 115lb again but also to maintain the weight and keep a healthy life style.
Last night I met with an old friend that I hadn't seen in over a year. It hit me how much has changed in the passed two years since i moved to Seattle. She wanted to do a selfie pic and when I took a look at it I realized how heavy I looked!!! It had been a while since I had tried on some of my old dresses, and to my horror when I got home I tried them on and could not fit in them! Not one....... So I weighed my self and I did not like what I saw..... also in the reflection of the bathroom mirror I noticed a new field of stretch marks that sprouted in my hips and abdomen.
Im taking a stand today, to put my health first because I want a good quality of life. I want to show my body the respect it deserves for working so hard for me every day when I'm on the job. I want my husband and I to build great habbits to be fit and healthy. I want to create a new pattern, instead of gaining weight I want to gain a new perspective in strength, endurence, dedication, decipline, training and motivation.
I dont want to feel like I did last night again. I want to be proud of my figure, and I want to fit into my clothes. I want to confidently wear a bikini next summer and I want to by a size 7 jeans! I want to cut back on the snacks and wine and mochas. I want to eat bigger meals earlier in the day and snack on more veggies. I want to reduce my refined sugar intake and processed food. I want more home cooked dinners and less dinners out. I want to join a gym nd continue with tap classes. I may also change my birth control because i think its also an attribute to my weight gain. I want to tone my muscles and sculpt my legs and abs. I want a tummy with out rolls on it....especially when I'm standing.
This won't be easy, there will be times when I have little motivation. I will be tired and I will complain and press the snooze instead of going for an a.m. walk. There will be times at work where I wont eat for up to 10 hours. I just have to remember why I am doing this. For me. So here's to life!!!!! It's time to wake up and have a new beggining!!!!!