PSA: I'm fat, not stupid.

04/20/2015 11:51AM

I just feel that people have many ways to say something kind or helpful. Sometimes they feel like their comments are helpful - no everyone is aware of how their compliments are actually of the backhanded variety. Why wouldn't you just say that you like my nail colour instead of saying that my hairstyle flatters my big chubby cheeks? Why wouldn't you say that you love my awesome wedges instead of telling me that a wide belt at the narrowest part of my waist (seriously? that's like right under my boobs!) would accentuate my figure? Perhaps I've become too sensitive but when I compliment someone I make sure that it's a true compliment and doesn't feed into common bodycon issues like weight, height, etc. I have never told anyone they would have a great smile if only they got braces! Why would someone tell me that the style of pants would look great after I've lost weight? Whoa! Sorry about that. I guess I just needed to unload some old baggage.

bahhhhh likes this comment.

View 2 more comments

GlampingGal

I thought of another incident that I need to exorcise: about a year ago I was 'loaned' to another team in my branch. During a team meeting, I was getting ready to tell my supervisor and colleagues that I would soon be requesting my summer vacation because the system for the camping reservations would be opening (this was in February, so it was admittedly early to be talking about camping). So I opened by saying that while it would seem to early to be talking about it... And then I cut off by my supervisor who asked if I had big news to share. Huh? It took a few seconds for my brain to catch up. He thought I was about to announce a pregnancy. So I just pretended to not know what he was talking about and jumped into the fact that I was getting ready to make some camping reservations for the summer. Goodness, how embarrassing! I will admit that at that time I was putting on weight quickly - but STILL!

bahhhhh

NO! Why do people comment about pregnancy at all? Everything they say is offensive. I had a co-worker who was tiny, and she had two different people ask if she was pregnant in the same week-- because she had an after-lunch pooch. And I mean tiny like 5'1" 100 lbs tiny. Tiny. That has never happened to me, but also mortifying, I had someone ask me if I ever planned to have kids, while I was 8 months pregnant. Um, I was fat and all, but I was clearly pregnant.