After all, are we alone?

Don't be sorry for needing to write. Many heal and process through the written word. I am sorry you are feeling this struggle, I have struggled similarly. It is hard when you have to prepare foods that you love for others to enjoy while you watch and eat something you are telling yourself you will grow to love. My husband won't eat chicken or seafood of any kind. He doesn't like most pork. He prefers potatoes, rice a roni, and any starchy foods. My husband has shared often that he has always been drawn to larger women. Until recently, he never knew me under 200 lbs and I often worried if my desire to lose weight would change our relationship, and it has. As my body is changing, my husband has shared that he is sad because my underarm flab is getting smaller (and he loves jiggling it). He also shared my but and legs are getting smaller. He is paying attention more, touching more and commenting more about what I am doing. I was told 2 days ago that he didn't think he would like a smaller but and legs, but he actually likes it better. There is hope in this, but you have to care more about you at this phase of the game. If you believe that he will hold you down, you need to figure outwhat kind of life preserver you will need before you drown and not fear reaching for it. You have to be the one to decide how long and how much you can handle.I believe in you! You are worth the time alone at the gym and the time alone eating healthier.