OMG! Busting Out All Over the Place!

Posted on September 12, 2014

Yesterday CeAnn wrote about finding balance for her life and her horse (great post). I wish I'd read it BEFORE I invaded the pantry. This past week has really thrown me and it hit the peak yesterday.

I have gone from a quiet home to chaos--at least it feels that way to me. My daughter is home from the treatment center--this is the GOOD news. She's on a home pass till Sunday and I'm so happy to be with her again! And if that were all, I'd be good. However, her sister, Amy, is also here with her son and dog. This is not a visit. She moved down from Chicago after her divorce and will be staying a few months until she can get back on her feet and find an apartment. Omg. All of a sudden there is no privacy, no real down time, no place to go to be alone. The pantry and refrigerator is no longer under my control and is packed to the gills with stuff for a skinny 19 yr old boy. We have pets in every room. The den is now a bedroom. They came in on Tuesday and I'm already at my wits end. I love both of them, but I haven't lived with them except for short visits.

Im basically an introvert and need 'me' time to let go and stay focused. I'm not sure how that's going to happen before the first of next year.

So, how did I deal with the stress? You guessed it, I ate all day. I need to own it and get back on track today. I was supposed to weigh in for a transformer bet today. I met the goal with a little to spare yesterday, but now I'm up. Heading to the gym this am and will try to make it up, but not sure I can. Aaaaarrrggghhh!

Im so glad to have a place here to rant a little.i can't tell my dh, he will be hurt and think I don't love them. I do, and that's not the point. You know how it feels when someone stands too closely when they're taliking to you? How you instinctively pull back? That's how I feel constantly, and there's no where to go.

I've got to find a way to pull myself together and adjust to my new, semi-permanant lifestyle. It seemed like such a good idea at the time

Comment Now!

Laura V.

09/15/2014 7:54PM

Good luck. Hang in there. As an introvert, I can totally understand this! Take time for yourself!!

Lynda H. likes this comment.

Cherie

09/13/2014 5:03PM

Oh Lynda what a great post! I can identify with your situation. This is a " stop the world so I can step off" moment. I know that you'll find your footing pretty soon! When moments like this happen ...look back and see what all you've overcome.. This will pass ..just take a deep breath. I'm in the same situation as my Mom went to the hospital while I was on vaca and then went to physical rehab for 20 days, She is doing very well but for an only child, it sent me in to a tailspin. I've LET myself eat but also signed up for Eat, Drink & Be next week to get back on track. We've come too far to be stopped!

Lynda H.

Hope you and you're mom are both doing better. It's amazing how stress and fear can send us in a tailspin

SusyQ

09/13/2014 7:32AM

Great advice in the comments. I hope you can all come to a workable solution. Hugs!!

Lynda H. and Cherie like this comment.

McPeak

09/12/2014 2:41PM

Hey lady!
I think you need to let all your houseguests know that you require their support and assistance in maintaining your healthy lifestyle. See if you can choose a time to be in the house alone for even just an hour - and the introduction I like to use in situations like this is, "So-and-so...I need your help with this...." Then share the specifics on what you hope they will support you with. When I have had to use this approach with management situations and difficult employees, it usually works. You make them your partner in getting what you want :)

Good luck, my friend! And stay strong. YOU ARE A STRONG, EMPOWERED, SKINNY WOMAN!!!

Hugs,
mcpeak :)

Lynda H., Cherie and Mau like this comment.

Lynda H.

Great idea!

Mau

So true you have to be open and ask for support.

no name

09/12/2014 8:35AM

Lynda I'm also dittoing everyone's posts. I recently had to finally put my foot down and talk to our kids about certain things they took advantage of or advantage of us. They had to know our life has change drastically since Rich's bypass and things will be different when they visit. They all understood and all is good.. I'm also so sorry you're having to deal with this right now, life is so not fair sometimes... please think of Lynda 1st, take care of you. many blessings to you....

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Lynda H.

Thanks. They need to know even if there's not much they can do.

HapiCampr

09/12/2014 8:16AM

Hi Lynda...if you feel like looking at one more post, here it is. I say ditto to everyone here, of course, and especially...wait for it...Adrienne. Her suggestion of talking with your kids is the key to being heard. Otherwise, they really don't have a clue that you even have needs. You are such a dear person full of love and I believe that is your approach. Instead of feeling overwhelmed and like taking flight from your own life, be that LOVE instead. Love and trust the kids enough to believe they would support you in your needs as well. If we don't give our kids a chance to grow up then they won't. You are my hero, even now in this differently stressful time for you. I know you have the capacity to negotiate a new and grownup relationship with Amy and her son. Ask them for help too. Give yourself the gift of open dialogue. You are an empowered individual full of love. You are playful and a beacon of light. Remember that dear one. Hugs

Lynda H., Bev and no name like this comment.

Lynda H.

Thanks tori!

LizzyinJapan

09/12/2014 7:33AM

I really agree with people who are saying you need to communicate with your family. I think even setting some ground rules, or off limits places, might help you feel like it's still your house and make them realize they are guests and shouldn't take over your world!
If you don't talk to them soon, they are going to be shocked and offended when you finally do. Better to make things clear in the beginning.

Another thing you could do is separate your food and theirs? When I lived with roommates we had our own cupboards and then split up the fridge by shelves. It may be tough to do, but whatever will help you to avoid temptation?

If you need to rant, your dietbet family is here for you! Stay motivated! Go exercise when you feel that stress! :D

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Lynda H.

I particularly like the idea of separating certain foods that I need to steer clear of, and yes, sigh, I need to talk to them

Susie D.

09/12/2014 7:11AM

Lynda, I started this healthy journey BECAUSE of the chaos in MY house. There wasn't much in my life that I had control over, but I COULD control what I put in my mouth and whether or not I exercised. If you are feeling overwhelmed and out of control, TAKE control of what you can. You may not be able to control kids/ pets/ food in your own house, but you CAN control what YOU put in your body.

If you need somewhere to hide out = go to they gym, go for a walk, go to the library, take a long bath.

I'm so sorry you're stressed. Take care of yourself. We're here for you. We will listen and offer support and advice if we have any. (((hugs)))

Mau, no name, anon-8a70e12d-3d3f-4915-b59a-46b8302e313f@6e28c68e-3150-4522-9ffa-6228bdeb4603.anon, HapiCampr and Lily W. like this comment.

Lynda H.

Good point, Susie. You're right. And writing this post was taking my first step. I needed to get the poison out of my system and admit my feelings so it can't get the best of me. Good ideas. Thanks, as always!

Cherie

Great post, Susie!

Sheryl P.

09/12/2014 6:43AM

So sorry you are going through such a hard time. My kids are away at college and it is a big challenge when they are home. I do not buy junk food anymore so when my 21 year old son is home, he wonders why we don't have chips and other goodies. I had to make it clear that I cannot have certain things in the house. I know your family is going through a hard time of their own but don't sacrifice your own well being.
Is there somewhere you can go during the day to do something for yourself and get out of the house more?

no name, HapiCampr and Susie D. like this comment.

Lynda H.

My favorite place not work related is my local B&N. I think they're going to see even more of me than usual!

adrienne121

09/12/2014 6:20AM

Lynda, I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this right now!!! It can be so overwhelming!!! The stress is not good for you either, especially while you're trying to heal. Do your children know how you feel & what you're going through? Instead of throwing yourself into a shell & eating for comfort, talk to them. We love our family, but if it's affecting you in a negative way, you have to speak up! Otherwise, you'll get sick! My sister went through a similar situation when her children moved back in with her. She was getting chemo treatments for breast cancer at the time. When she called to tell me what she was going through, I told her that it was very important that she focused on herself in order to heal. I also told her to talk to them & to let them know how she was feeling. I said if they care, they'll do whatever's necessary to make the transition of them being in her home more comfortable for her. She did, & things got much better. I hope things get better for you. HUGS & LUV!

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Lynda H.

Adrienne, I know you're right, and I admit I don't want to do it. More concerned about dh than the kids. We’ll see